I’ve had just about enough today! Could do with getting back into bed until next Wednesday when all my cash has cleared and I can get over the things that are griping me!
1. Clients who don’t pay when they should and inconvenience me. I’ve had a few clients recently who think it’s fine to pay me next time, especially with bigger cheques. I feel really tight saying ‘no. I’ve got a business to run’ as some of them are friends. The same with last minute cash cancellations. When they don’t pay, I don’t eat. It’s that simple. What I hate is that they do it face to face. They look me in the eye and say ‘can I pay you next time?’ I guess I should walk into Nationwide Autocentres today and say that to them.
2. Because of this, I had to postpone my car service from last week. Not only that, but I’ve been having to borrow money from Steve to pay for things like brake discs and pads when I shouldn’t have to. It’s really naughty of them not to pay, and it makes me feel bad for asking. Likewise, not turning up when they pay session by session. I guess I’ll chalk it up to lessons learnt and things not to do in France! Whether it’s £20 or £200, it’s all the same. I can’t buy the stuff I need to get through life, because I haven’t been paid. I charge low prices when I could charge more, and yet people take advantage of that. Maybe I should learn the more expensive I am, the more they’ll value me.
3. I’ve got three or four bills I can’t pay until next week, when I should have paid them this week. I hate being backed up. I hate that they’ve caused this. I hate that I’m not more business-minded enough to say ‘No. I’m sorry, but no pay, no deal. Now fuck off.’ Next time, I’ll ask for payment up front. Lesson learnt #2
4. I paid £90 for two holes yesterday. Brake discs with four holes = £15. Brake discs with five holes = £43.00 Plus VAT. Joy. I’m paying for less. Luckily, I have Steve to thank that I got anything at all. He coughed up the rest. He also fitted them. Last time I had new pads and discs, I had a £350 bill. I paid £100 for parts yesterday. I’m a lucky girl. I have to say, the last few months have taught me a lot about relying on family and friends. And it doesn’t feel good to rely on them, but what can you do? Lesson learnt #3
5. People are ungrateful. You do them favours and it just isn’t enough for them. They think I’m being awkward when I offer advice and that I’m making their life hard, when in reality what they’ve asked for is dumb. So dumb it doesn’t bear thinking about. Lesson learnt #4. Don’t do favours for friends who need your skills and then interfere. If I ask someone to do something for me and then interfere when I couldn’t do it myself, then I should be shot. I kind of griped about my mum pruning my hedges, but really I was grateful! I appreciate ‘mum’ pruning! Sometimes it’s needed! I don’t ask people to do me a favour, like when Steve and Dean laid my floor, and then complain about what they’ve done, when they did it for free and they didn’t have to. Maybe this teaches me to be more grateful!
6. I am right about a lot of stuff. I’m right about how things will look. I’m right about my areas of expertise. I know what works. And when people who don’t know what works try and tell me how to do it, it properly pisses me off! Especially when that person is a no-nothing, over-rated, self-inflated, pompous arse who for the last 20 years has systematically blanked me or forgotten who I am. Knob jockey! Lesson number # blah… people don’t often change, especially those who are blessed with a certain surname. Once a wannabe, always a wannabe. It must be hard having no other talents and being unable to adapt.
7. I’m being punished financially… 180 euros for two ‘new’ tyres – one of them has done 1,200 miles and I need another. £120 for a new CV joint which should have lasted 150,000 miles, but because of the surface of Bolton’s roads, it makes my mechanic think I’ve been driving off road in rallies. 3 and a half years ago, I made my first complaint. Tyres/axles, it’s all the road surfaces. My sister got 2 punctures last week. Britain is a shithole. Our roads are covered in glass and cans and litter and bits of metal and nails. It makes me feel sick that this ‘cost’ is as a result of the council’s negligence. That’s £50 for an MOT, £80 tax, ridiculous insurance, and about £600 of new parts on a 50,000 five year old car. A car which shouldn’t need £600 worth of parts.
Financial responsibility is a heavy responsibility, man!
How much do I need a cigarette right now??! I’m sitting here in the freezing cold, unable to turn up the heat on my ridiculously priced gas and electric bills, unable to pay for car parts, waiting for my bank to clear cheques. I hate this side of life. And all the while, my crops are withering because some shitty volcano in Iceland has decided to spew its effluence into the universe to remind us that Black Swan events are here for always, and that Mother Nature has her way of putting a spanner in the works of mankind!