J’ai un coup de veine

Well, Steve has three working days left. Seems like forever since it was forty-six! In a week, we will be setting off for La France to buy a property, I hope, I really, really hope! And I’m a quivering bag of nerves and anxiety and excitement, but mostly ‘l’angoisse’ – absolute and utter anguish!

Millions of things to be done beforehand, including MOT (FAIL – I can see it coming!) and probably new tyres and new brakes and a billion other things I can’t afford! and car tax and euros and essentials-packing and xylene and paint-brushes and chaos…

How am I possibly going to coordinate other people when I can’t coordinate myself?!?

In less than 10 days, we will, or will not, be owners of French property. And some of my worries will lift.

Actually owning the house will be a start. Having paid for it, having our name on the deeds, it’s a start. But then other worries occur… wood-worm, asbestos, lead, floodings after this year’s tempest, water heating bills, oil-heating bills, electricity bills, sorting out phones and internet connections and setting up businesses (with help from the lovely Valerie at http://www.startbusinessinfrance.com which has already been invaluable) and registering cars and bikes and transporting stuff. And Oh My God What Am I Doing??!

Maybe, by August, I’ll feel a little less ill.

Steve, however, is demob-happy. He’s excited and giddy and full of plans. I like it. I like that he’s not plagued by these worries, most of which are pretty pointless, but it will be better when they’re under control. I’m such a control freak it’s hard when everything goes a bit crazy, though the last three years have taught me a bit about living on the edge. Steve’s got three working days left, including a half day where he’s going out for dinner, and his biggest worry is that his big boss will do a speech and he’ll have to do a speech. Public speaking isn’t for him. Strangely, I don’t mind it. I’ll speak to millions of people, all at once.

And I’m glad he’s excited. He deserves to be. I like this relaxed, carefree Steve. I’m hoping it doesn’t all end in a panic and chaos. But I think he’s looking forward to frugal living, having made his big purchases to see him through. Some kind of ‘sucked toffee’ thing (I’ve still not worked out what it does…) that made me think ‘that’s a year’s worth of house insurance!’ and a mini-moto for Jake. We’re set about by ‘reclaimed’ items that he’s bringing with him. Used shower, anyone?? But he has got rid of the safe, which to be fair, I have mixed feelings about. I liked it, in all honesty. It made me feel a bit like I was going to be running a town in a Western. And he’s given it to his mum. However, in the name of sense, we didn’t need it and so I’m kind of a bit relieved we don’t have to take it with us… even though I liked it, in a non-bank-needy kind of way.

So I’m still not sure how he’s planning on getting all this into one van and across to France. I’m not going to ask!

I’m hoping that I just manage to make it through without complications and that I don’t fall apart before then.

Inside it all, I’m hoping I’ve landed on my feet (once again!) and that it all goes to plan. It’s about time something did! I can’t wait until I can actually say the house is mine, and that Les Ecures is mine, and that I have a new address. I can’t wait to move on with address labels (I have the cutest designs in mind!) and letting everyone know, winding down here and starting up somewhere else. I feel a bit superstitious about it all, like not announcing a pregnancy until it’s really necessary, just so as not to bring bad luck to it. I don’t want to say the words of my address as if something bad will happen to stop it in its tracks, a bit like Chez Blanchard, though I hope we’re far enough down the line for it to be fine now. Still, I’m terrified that a week next Friday, I’ll be coming out of Maitre Ferrant’s without my keys and crying my eyes out because it’s all fallen apart at the seams, when really, secretly, I’m hoping that I’ll be going over at 3:00 to our new home, and seeing the delight on Steve’s face. I wish I was more in control of the outcome!

So, from now until then, I’ll be reading my stars and taking their advice; I’ll be tipping my proverbial hat to magpies (saw five together today, and then two… I’m hoping for good!); I’ll be watching out for black cats!

And, maybe, just maybe, j’aurais un coup de veine!

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